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Divorcing a Narccisist? Tips & Tricks

Any divorce can feel like an uphill battle, even if you're on good terms with your spouse and collaborating with them is easy. If your spouse suffers from narcissistic personality disorder, however, that can make the divorce process even more challenging, increasing the difficulty of reaching an equitable agreement or engaging in a fair argument in the courtroom.

Today, we're exploring the different facets of divorcing a narcissist, so you can pursue the best outcome for your immediate and long-term future.

To schedule a consultation with our team for your divorce, contact us online or via phone at (702) 996-6052.

Consider Working with a Counselor Who Understands NPD

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) manifests in many different ways. If you've been with a spouse who has NPD for a significant amount of time, it may be hard to identify when your spouse is displaying signs of NPD, or where you should draw boundaries with them during the divorce process.

An accredited psychologist or counselor who understands NPD can help identify behaviors consistent with NPD and develop appropriate, healthy boundaries with your spouse.

Working with a mental health professional in this capacity can be both empowering for yourself as you reclaim your life and boundaries, and also help you obtain a better outcome in your divorce.

Start Documenting Things As Meticulously As You Can

Many people with NPD suffer from a need to be in control of their environment at all times. As a result, they may fabricate falsehoods if it helps them maintain a feeling of control.

Unfortunately, this often results in narcissists telling outright lies to courts during divorce cases, even in situations where the other party already has access to evidence that can expose the falsehood. As a result, having evidence to support your assertions during the divorce is particularly important if you're divorcing a narcissist.

Start by making copies of important documents, particularly ones concerning financial assets and liabilities you and your spouse share or own separately. Copies of documents such as tax returns, ownership documents, and even records of your spouse's behavior during the court case could all help you obtain a better outcome in your divorce and deal with your soon-to-be-ex's NPD more effectively.

Try to Reduce Contact (& Conflict) As Much As Possible

As we mentioned earlier, many people diagnosed with NPD will create conflict or drama to try and feel like they're in control of their environment.

If you want to prevent conflict in your divorce and your spouse is a narcissist, you may want to consider reducing contact with them as much as you possibly can. You may not be able to eliminate contact with them entirely, especially if you're attempting to use a form of alternative dispute resolution such as mediation to resolve your divorce, but consider placing restrictions on when you discuss matters. If you can, it may even be worth placing down a hard boundary that you will refuse to discuss matters with your spouse unless both your attorneys are present.

If You Share Children, Monitor Their Treatment Closely

Unfortunately, many individuals diagnosed with NPD will attempt to use any children they share with their spouse as pawns in their divorce, even if they have been a good parent up to that point.

If you share children with your spouse, try and keep tabs on how your spouse talks about you with your children as best you can. Some spouses will attempt to coach their children into saying untrue things about a co-parent to try and get a better outcome in their divorce. Keeping your finger on the pulse of how your spouse is treating your children can help you avoid a situation where your kids become unnecessarily entangled in the divorce.

At Leavitt Law Firm, our attorneys are here to ensure you pursue the best possible outcome in your divorce case. To schedule a consultation with our team, contact us online or via phone at (702) 996-6052.

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